### Grapefruits

1. It takes approx eleven shakes of the tree (1 per branch) to down approx 180 grapefruit.

2. 180 grapefruits completely fill a wagon approx 3 foot by 1 foot by piled high.

3. I had to use the children's wagon cos the new one doesn't have a back on it. Yet. A wagon without a back is useless for grapefruits. In fact it isn't a wagon at all. It's a dray.

4. 120 grapefruits take approx 50 minutes to squeeze by hand.

5. 120 grapefruits yield 3 litres of juice and forty litres of compost. (The compost bucket formerly contained 10 litres of paint.)

6. Approx 0 members of the BHPC are in a position to challenge these claims.

7. Approx 0 members of the BHPC want to.

8. I have a sore shoulder.

9. And the kitchen floor's all sticky.

10.

*And*I've still got sixty to do.

11.

**the tree's still got hundreds and hundreds on it.**

*And*12. Whinge whinge whinge etc. for quite a long time.

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